JB day trip

Yesterday was memorable.
Me and Terence had such a huge fight.
By the end of it, he made me realise how insensitive, selfish, snobbish and critical I am.

I don't wish to forget this.
He's never one to complain, and tis the first time he's airing this out.
I was taken aback...cos I really didn't see the huge fight coming.
It started out innocently enough, about him being pissed with me for not crossing the road properly.
Who would have thought?

I cried and thought, thought and cried.
I haven't felt so sad for a long while. Never felt so much despise for myself.
So angry with myself and hating myself so much for being a mean, horrible person.
I know i can be terrible if left unchecked.
I know i take him for granted.
I know I impose double standards all the time.
I know i am a terrible, mean witch.

Today, we went to JB City Square mall.
Took the day off and hailed a local cab for the return trip.
So-so day walking around the mall, which is full of Singaporean brands like MPH, Popular bookstore, Cathay Cineleisure, Action city toy shop, Food Junction (!!!) and Kenny Rogers.
In other words, boring.
The most exciting part was when we goofed around in the Neoprint booth, camera-whoring with stupid poses and blowing RM$50 on those kiddy Jap cards.
Had Japanese lunch and also wasted time in a cafe before finally leaving at 4+ pm.

It felt different though.
He's very protective as always.
Sometimes when we are travelling, i feel like i have a bodyguard with him around.
But something jus felt different.
Maybe its the aftermath of the huge quarrel.

Last nite, I asked myself:
How would it feel to love someone who doesn't love you anymore?
How would it feel to continue loving that person, knowing that his heart is not like before?

That would be the worst case scenario.