Not Complaining

Today kinda showed me, subtly, what it'll be like if I were a full-time mom.
It wasn't a lousy day, or even bad in any way.
Just... exhausting and very very testing.
It actually made me feel thankful to have a job.
It made me feel blessed that i have days like these, as well as days in the office to balance up life.

Marco was just being a totally typical toddler today.
But i wasn't being a typical mom.
My patience was running out and he just needed SO MUCH attention.
He needs you to answer his every whine, respond to his every call, accompany him on everything he wanna check out.
It's so exhausting!
The irony? I had a full solid 12-hour sleep the nite before.
On an average day, i would have lasted till the wee hours.
But by 7pm, i was ready to tear my hair out and collapse on the bed.
Total K-O!

Yes, motherhood is so depleting.
It is the hardest job in the world, cos there's no switching off.
There's no lunch "break", no coffee times, no clock-in/clock-out.
Maybe a wee time-out when he takes a nap, but mostly even then, you are busy preparing for stuff for when he wakes up again.

Maybe that's the difference between a job and a role.
Mothering is a role. You are it, 24/7, rest of your living years.
Maybe the only reason we can do our job is cos, it's just a job.
We're ultimately detached from it.
Nothing will collapse if we quit/lose our jobs (except financially maybe).
It's not our whole life.

What an epiphany from a loooong day.