It was weird bumping into you that day.
Try as I might, I cannot shake off that eery awkward moment.
It was strange.
You text-ed me the other day saying you wish to see me.
And ka-boom, a couple weeks later, you really do.
Most peculiar.
You look good.
Better than when I left you.
You seem less tanned, but still in very good shape.
And surprise surprise to hear you say you have taken up,
Of all things, running.
I used to lug you to run, even a short jolt around your place.
And I sensed none of your newfound vigour and enthusiasm.
Our conversation was most awkward, wasn't it?
I didn't know how to talk to you.
Like a friend, or should I act coy and pretend I dun know you that well?
Should I act interested in your life
Or show disdain for all you touch, seeing that you were such a cad and cow.
You have changed a lot.
You speak a lot more eloquently.
Look sharper, more polished and more well put together on the whole.
But alas, you have lost the appeal that drew me in the first place.
The sporty nature, the boyishness, the down-to-earth humour and humility.
Now, you are just another cog in the corporate wheel.
I noticed your LV wallet, your sleek shirt and leather shoes.
Very different from our student days.
I tried to be ambivalent and objective, but failed.
But I'm glad you are marrying the girl you cheated on me with.
At least some good came out of your bravado.
Isn't it strange we are marrying within a fortnight of each other?
Knowing you tat well, I don't see how you can be anyone's husband.
Does she know the real you?
How irresponsible, selfish, immature and fraught you can be.
A girl's whole life and love resting on you.
I almost feel sorry for her.
I hope you can provide more of the love, security and promises than you gave me.
I wish you well.
Does she know about me?
I wonder what kind of stories you spin her.
But alas, despite all,
I need to thank you.
Our split was one of the turning points in my life.
I learnt more from you and our relationship than any others.
I changed distinctly after that. On the relationship front, at least.
And how much more i love myself and my life now.
I used to worship at the altar that is you and our love.
Stupidity is thus.
My husband now has all the qualities I sought to find in you.
And mistakenly thought you had, thanks to your great facade.
I am so glad and grateful for a second real shot at love.
And this time, everyth is wonderful.
If not for the blatant liar and cad you were, I may never know what bliss and true simple love feels like.
There are occasionally flashes of familiarity
The only difference is, Terence is true and pure and honest.
But you certainly left your mark. Deep.
No matter what, you have made me create a sense of suspicion and defence.
I can never trust as wholly and innocently.
And I can never let myself go the way people do when they are in love.
Our breakup has taught me to protect myself first, and love second.
I hope you also went away with something more painful, permanent and deep
than a newfound interest in running.
